MOVIE REVIEW: Silent Night (2012)

Yes Virginia, there are killer Santa films. Quite a few in fact, although none of them in particular have been very good. Silent Night in fact happens to be a "loose remake" of a controversial 80s slasher called (more pretentiously) Silent Night Deadly Night. I have seen the original before, and by all means, it's one tasteless, sick puppy of a film. It's not enjoyable by any stretch if you're looking for entertainment, but requires the viewer to suspend some moral fiber in case it might offend (a couple shots of strong eggnog will help). I have no interest in reviewing it for the sake of my sanity, but I came across the remake out of low expectations that maybe they tried something different and markedly improved. The result? Yes, but not by much...

In a small, Wisconsin town on Christmas Eve, the Sherriff and his young, attractive Deputy have responded to a bizarre murder where the killer has allegedly been sighted as wearing a Santa suit. That's bad news for the populace, because the town is so fired up for Christmas that they throw an annual Santa parade, complete with hundreds of potential suspects dressed as St. Nick. Each killing leads the duo to piece together a pattern to the murders, until they discover the killer Kringle's true motive.

The most distinct aspect this film has going for it is the police procedural, mystery edge to the story, that's helmed by the Sherriff and Deputy. The problem is, it's done a little clumsily, with a lot of guess-work going on in an attempt to create what ends up being poorly-written suspense that's barely worthy of "CSI." The rest is typical, ultra-violent, slasher fare with creative "kill-scenes" that are obviously a throwback to the 80s - bratty girl electrocuted by cattle prod, topless porn actress fed into a woodchipper, elf-clad blonde impaled on deer antlers (which also happened in the original) - I swear, I'm not making any of this up. Surely there's a core audience who...appreciates...this sort of stuff. Most of the time, I was either wincing or raising my eyebrows in disbelief.

I guess what the film does have going for it is Jamie King's performance as the Deputy, since she really manages to come off as the only relatable character in the entire story. Even the killer's identity feels like something of an afterthought, tacked onto the "meh" screenplay and leaving the door open for a possible slew of direct-to-DVD sequels. Also, let's face it: Most of my generation was raised on a diet of chipper Christmas films, only to discover "alternative" fare like Gremlins, or Die Hard in later years. I always welcome something "different" for the holidays. The only difference between those films and Silent Night, is that they were better films.

6/10

Peace,
- Jon

MOVIE REVIEW: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012)

Hello everyone, hope you're all enjoying your holidays. I've been back from school for roughly about a week, but have resumed blogging after a week of decadence. I just needed some "me" time, but now I'm done. Anyway, for the first of my three reviews, here's The Hobbit.

Most Tolkien fans are already familiar with the story: prior to Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, Bilbo Baggins is paid a visit by Gandalf and a group of dwarves who he joins on a quest to reclaim their kingdom from a threatening dragon. Although Bilbo is reluctant at first, he discovers a sense of adventure amidst the journey, including a fateful encounter with a wayward hobbit named Gollum and "The One Ring."

Putting it nicely, The Hobbit is to Lord of the Rings what the Star Wars prequels are to the original trilogy. Some may cry blasphemy at my comparison, but I generally enjoyed those films, even if they were wholly inferior in comparison to their predecessors. The Hobbit dazzles viewers with the help of a ten-year advance in special effects between the series. Although I did not see the film in it's controversially ground-breaking, "soap opera-like" 48 frames-per-second, I've seen enough film and TV on LCD projections that I know it's really best served for films like these where the "smoothness" makes the CGI less obvious. At 169 minutes, it's a long endeavor, but with enough adventure, imagination, and distinct characters that it will keep your attention.

The Hobbit's biggest flaw is that it's esotericism comes with a strong reliance on comic relief, whereas viewers unfamiliar with Tolkien at the time Lord of the Rings was released (like me) were tenaciously drawn into the world of Middle Earth thanks to the trilogy's strong dramatic thrust. The Hobbit leans heavily on mild-frathouse humor, mostly from the dwarves. While it worked in bits and pieces in Rings, here it feels at times excessive, and borders on amateurish. Mature audiences (like my parents) will likely be bored by these antics, but the target teenage audience will likely gobble it up.

Most sentimentally, The Hobbit is a welcome reunion to Middle Earth for characters that were originally introduced in the series, and then some. I doubt it will win serious artistic accolades, but as a technical powerhouse, it is a force to be reckoned with.

7/10

Peace,
- Jon

MOVIE REVIEW: Argo (2012)

I'm really excited for the way this year has been shaping up, so far as film goes. And while this year has been punctuated by some good political works and thrillers, Argo is a successful combination of the two, with an even more unique plot. Being a true story, makes this one icing on the cake.

After being treated to a retro, WB-logo opening, the audience is briefed on the global political situation in 1979: The cancer-ridden Shah of Iran is controversially granted asylum in the United States, leaving his country behind poor, and his people bitter; all allegedly due to his excessive lifestyle and forced Westernization. Later that year, angry Iranians storm the American embassy, taking hostages while six manage to escape, taking sanctuary in the Canadian embassy. In 1980, knowing the foreign-servicemen and women's time in Iran is short, CIA agent Tony Mendez plans an extradition involving a false Canadian film production for a sci-fi sleazefest called "Argo." Once in Iran, Mendez needs to appease both the government and his countrymen that he needs to rescue, before executing the operation itself.

Argo is a caper film that feels very much like a product of it's time, and that's a good thing. Thrillers were among the top of their game around this point in time, at least what I've seen on an international scale. There's not a whole lot of action, but instead replaced by tense moments, human drama, and skilled attempts at making documentary/news footage relevant with what's happening. Essentially, the film is broken down into three tangible acts where the rescue operation is chronicled. By the time the film reaches the third act, you know how it's going to go down, but you're just as scared as the Americans as director Ben Affleck jumps us through Hitchcockian-hoops of tension that had my audience audibly gasping for air after these moments passed.

So then, the one area where Argo does feel a little strange is during the Hollywood sequence, where Mendez needs to find a pitch for the film. It's highly comical, lighthearted, and entertaining (with a hilarious performance by Alan Arkin, as a cantankerous producer), but felt a little out of place with the cold sincerity of the rest of the film. It's really hard to fault one part that happens to be highly entertaining, it's just a litte inconsistent with the tone of everything else.

Nonetheless, Argo is a tense, character-driven thriller that is definitely worth your time, and possibly one of the better films that you'll see all year. I won't be surprised if it picks up a few nods over the course of next year.

9/10

Peace,
- Jon

MOVIE REVIEW: Lincoln (2012)

Steven Spielberg, ever the consummate filmmaker, delivers a pensive, and thought-provoking account of President Abraham Lincoln's last four months in office. As with most films who's subject is a non-fictional character, I entered Lincoln with a sense of open-mindedness in considering which direction the story will go in. Although I would have liked to have seen some other areas of Lincoln's story elaborated on, as a film on his greatest achievement, this is a fine work, indeed.

Written by acclaimed playwright Tony Kushner, the story deals with the battles Lincoln undertook from within his cabinet to get the 13th Amendment, the Emancipation Proclamation, ratified in an attempt to end the Civil War. By abolishing slavery in the Union, Lincoln was convinced this amendment would make the Union look more sympathetic to abolitionists and slaves alike. Along with the ensuing political gridlock, he audience also gets a glimpse into his family life, detailing his strained marriage to his wife, and struggle with his eldest son's choice to join the army.

This film, in general, is a treat for history buffs. Those who revel in production aesthetics will be overjoyed by the 1860s costumes, Colonial architecture, and the detail Kushner and the actors have paid towards the speech and dialogue. The acting is outstanding, and I wouldn't be surprised if Lincoln collects the SAG award for Best Ensemble this year. It's no surprise that the biggest stars deliver the most notable performances. Tommy Lee Jones steals every scene he's in as the curmudgeonous Thaddeus Stevens. Sally Field as Mary Todd Lincoln does not get a lot of screen time, but portrays Mrs. Lincoln's fragility and mercurial personality perfectly. Daniel Day-Lewis...words alone will not do justice for the talent he brings as our 16th president, right down to the distinct inflection of his voice he brings Lincoln to life. I expect to see much news of him, come awards season.

So my criticisms of Lincoln relate mainly to the execution of the story itself. The title implies a biography, but Lincoln is nothing of the sort; just a chronicle of the man's most important moment of his entire presidency. The title's basically a draw-in; it would've been more appropriate and honest to call it something more related to the subject matter. Speaking of which, the glimpses and melodrama we observe of Lincoln's family are some of the most dramatic moments from a theatrical perspective. It's not to say Spielberg wasted some fine opportunities to explore these areas, but when one looks at something like The Godfather and says there can't be an argument made for great character drama in a contrasting story, I become skeptical.

Nonetheless, I still consider Lincoln one of the best films, albeit a flawed one, that 2012 had to offer.

8/10

Peace,
- Jon

MOVIE REVIEW: Skyfall (2012)

Skyfall is, in my opinion, without a doubt, the best of Daniel Craig's James Bond films. It's the perfect storm of the series' capable present roster of actors, renowned director Sam Mendes (who's responsible for one of my favorites, American Beauty), and a crew of reputable technicians with equally impressive resumes (I'm not kidding, there's at least 10 Oscar nods among the principals in the main credits). After a solid, but thematically jarring debut with Casino Royale and the underwhelmingly perfunctory Quantum of Solace, Skyfall is a welcome entry in the series that achieves something rare in James Bond films: It functions perfectly well as a stand-alone-film.

Of course, it would be a travesty not to mention Adele's exceptional eponymous title song that almost makes up for the trauma my ears endured from Alicia Keys and Jack White's "Another Way to Die." Adele, like the film itself, belts a tune that harkens back to James Bond's jazzy 1960s roots. It's a tragically romantic torch song with an incendiary beat that underlies the doom-and-gloom tone of the film, while still achieving a refined sound and infectious melody.

The film begins with Bond and his attractive female colleague Eve pursuing a terrorist in Turkey. Whilst fighting him atop a train, Bond is hit by friendly fire from Eve's sniper rifle and plummets into the ocean. Although Bond survives and lays low; taking a much-needed sabbatical filled with women and booze, his boss M starts taking heat from the British government (in the form of the Intelligence Committee Chairman, played by Ralph Fiennes) after a mysterious computer glitch outs the MI6 roster of "00 agents." Determined to unmask the culprit, M takes MI6 "underground," rehabilitates Bond, and hires a young hacker (who later beomes Q) to design new gadgetry for Bond. After identifying the culprit, the tables begin to turn as this cyberterrorist not only turns out to be crazy, but is out for revenge against MI6. 007 himself will need to get in touch with his past, in order to defeat this madman.

I thouroughly enjoyed everything about Skyfall in that it was such a fresh approach to a medium that has become long in the tooth. The best way I could describe this film can't even be with one adjective. It's a lot like The Dark Knight in that the film has a foreboding atmosphere and build-up towards very violent or tense conclusions. Since the series has reached it's 50th birthday, there are a lot of fun references thrown in to prior works; it's done in a refreshingly subtle way, and considerably less in-your-face than the last "anniversary Bond film," the over-the-top Die Another Day. Javier Bardem also gives a chilling performance as the villain, whose behavior strikingly resembles that of Heath Ledger's immortal rendition of The Joker. The rest of the main cast does well with the story, which does an interesting job of exploring more of Bond's past, all of which leads up to a gripping conclusion that opens the door to a more familiar direction for the series that Bond fans will likely be more comfortable with.

If there is any complaint to be had, it's that the film is very atypical-Bond when it comes to the more decadent aspects of the series. This is not one of those films where Bond gets to shmooze around with beautiful women and nice hotels (in fact, we only get one of those moments in Shanghai. His earlier escapades are sleazy, but not that explicit). Skyfall tones down these elements in order to put more focus on the main story. Even the main Bond girls are somewhat underplayed; Judi Dench, for the most part, is the film's "Bond girl" based on the amount of screen-time she shares with Bond, as well as her larger role in the story. It may be a bit disappointing for some fans, but more likely than not, something they will complain hinders the film, too much.

It's hard to say whether or not Skyfall is the best James Bond film ever made. To call one film in the series "the best" is arguably an objective notion when six different actors have played the same role in 23 films. Fans have their loyalties, and sentimentalities, as I have mine with GoldenEye. I would certainly argue that at this point in the canon of Daniel Craig's Bond films, Skyfall is the bloke's magnum opus. His tenure and the series will most likely take a different turn in the subsequent installment, but as the final chapter in his unofficial introductory "trilogy" as Bond, Skyfall takes chances, maintains a tense pace, and is simply an excellent spy/thriller in the vein of it's contemporaries that happens to masquerade as a "Bond film."

Until Christopher Nolan directs a James Bond film, well...this will just have to do for now.

9/10

Peace,
- Jon

MOVIE REVIEW: Sinister (2012)

Due to my current, inhumanely hectic obligations to law school, it is a depressingly rare occasion for me to go out to the movies. Fortunately, such an occasion arose with a group of friends last evening to see this film: Sinister, this month's very hyped, indie-horror(?), creep-fest. It's a fun offering for serious horror fans, but only progresses so far enough as an intriguing concept to be anything but groundbreaking.

Murder-mystery novelist Ellison (Ethan Hawke) and his family move into a house, where unbeknownst to everyone in the family but him, was the site of a gruesome murder that affected the last inhabiting family. Ellison finds a box of old, super-8 home movies in the attic and discovers the footage to be that of the murders; recorded by the killer. During his research, Ellison stumbles upon the ghastly image of who he supposes is the killer. Although this discovery helps inspire him to write his newest story, he also learns after consulting with police, experts, and experiencing some paranormal activity, that what was shot on film isn't everything it appears to be.

Post-viewing, I read a review for the film on blu-ray.com, where the critic stated:

“Sinister” joins a growing trend of horror movies offering characters who don’t react appropriately to unequivocal proof of their own future doom, a bewildering screenwriting concept recently explored in the last three “Paranormal Activity” pictures.

This comment basically addresses my largest criticism with the plot, being that the story is wholly negated when taking into consideration that Ellison made some poor decisions that result in the film's plot. This is common in horror films; it's a Pandora's Box archetype. Sure, by psychoanalyzing Ellison's motives, his actions are perfectly understandable. The problem is, as a contribution to narrative, it passes off as cliche, and frustrates the viewer who knows he would have done something more logical (like turning the home movies immediately in to the police!), and perhaps made for a more compelling story.

Still, Sinister is an interesting blend of a number of horror elements: The occult, ghosts, haunted houses, serial murder, and "found footage." It's a fun ride for genre lovers who enjoy getting scared; I definitely jumped a few times. And the concept, while a hybrid, is fresh enough to appreciate. Here's hoping if money talks, that it tells the studio to produce a more fleshed-out, credible sequel. I'd be interested to see where the story keeps going...

7/10

Peace,
- Jon

MOVIE REVIEW: The Expendables 2 (2012)

In 2010, Sylvester Stallone unleashed every fanboy's testosterone-infused paradise upon the world - The Expendables: A no-holds, ensemble action tribute to the ultra-violent 80s serials, featuring many big names in the genre. It's easily a dude's answer to Sex and the City. While a fun film, I felt it needed a little extra *oomph* in the action sequences and less of the banal, double-digit IQ verbal exchanges. Two years later, Stallone somehow answered my nitpicky criticisms with The Expendables 2 a rare instance of a sequel that bests the original in every way possible. The coup de grâce (and I'm not ashamed of SPOILING this) being a trifecta shootout in the finale with the owners of Planet Hollywood themselves:

If this scene doesn't convince you to see the film, then I don't know what will. I'm convinced at least half the American male population has been waiting for this moment in film history.

And then, there's Chuck Norris (cue: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly theme):



...need I say more? The man appears in two scenes, but they're a killer (pun absolutely intended).

Now, onto the plot - Without elaborating too much (because honestly, who watches these films for plot?), Sly gets together the old gang once again to take on what is supposedly an "easy job" somewhere in the deserted mining towns of Albania. The mercenaries excursion goes fine until their newest and youngest recruit is ruthlessly whacked by Jean-Claude "The Muscles from Brussels" Van Damme, himself. Fixated on revenge (and wanting the item they came looking for, now stolen by Van Damme), the mercs go to town by doing what they do best - shooting first, and asking questions later. Ironically, violence is the answer to all their problems in this bullet-riddled fantasy.

This sequel has a lot going for it. Aside from the new cast members, the action is easily doubled from the first film, and the one-liners are much more in-tune with the stylings of Governor Schwarzenegger's work in the late-1980s. There's even a few nods to every cast member's previous works, typically in the dialogue. Moreover, I got a better sense of adventure, and even...um...character development than the first film. Sure, Expendables 2 isn't going to win any Academy Awards (at least in the artistic categories), but I'm sure that's not why people would go see it in the first place. I'm happy to say that as an action film, it was one of my favorites of the year, and it was nice to see the summer movie season of 2012 go out with a bang, in both senses of the word.

8/10

Peace,
- Jon